I”When I see lovers names carved into a tree I don’t think it’s cute, I just think it’s strange how many people take knives on a date.”
Shall we tell them that Halloween is supposed to be celebrated on the 31st?? Nope. That’s hopeless; they don’t even know the costumes are meant to be scary.
These days Twitter makes you think you’re famous, Instagram makes you think you’re a photographer, Facebook makes you think you have friends… The wake up will be tough.
Yesterday, right after I published my last chapter, I had a chat with some person I once met on the road – someone who’s pretty much like me – I mean she’s reached that same stage of life when it’s time to hang up the backpack for a while after several years spent crossing borders faster than diplomats.
It’s been interesting to come to the conclusion that for us – people who, in the end, are used to run away anytime something goes wrong – staying somewhere safe in a steady environment seem so much tougher than vagabonding… A real everyday challenge. But the good news is that I slowly learn to love my flag again.
“People say that walking away is the hardest thing to do, but it isn’t. Staying, even when you know it will break your heart, is the toughest. Staying right where you are, waiting for your entire world to be ripped into pieces is much harder than walking away and starting a new one.”
All in all you could call this the “quarter-life crisis”; that bastard age when you’re forced to go back at your parents after several years of independence. That age when you no longer have grandparents, you’re irremediably growing old and – technically – the ones who are the soonest gonna turn grandpas are… your own parents… Fuck me, I haven’t seen that one coming.
That awkward age when you struggle quite badly to find a job – mostly because of your lack of experience. “You won’t hire me because I don’t have experience, I don’t have experience because you won’t hire me.”
A period filled with doubts and continual personal questioning.“Gotta get up and try”, whether you like it or not the game is on and the day will dawn with or without you.
“A year ago, I would’ve never pictured my life the way it is now.”
The quarter-life crisis, I find it interesting too because whether they admit it or not, it is currently happening to pretty much all of my friends disregarding what they studied or where they from. But we don’t all deal with it the same way. Once again, keeping a positive attitude seem to me like the best way to overcome it. Just like for everything in life – and as Banksy himself said – “the grumpier you are, the more assholes you meet.”
Just take it easy lads, no one said it would be easy. Oh yes, maybe your teacher in your business school that cost your parents an arm, two legs and roughly €10.000 a year. Yes, this guy, this guy who gets paid to tell you what you wanna hear. He told you that you’d get the best job you can ever dream of right away when you’d graduate. News flash just for you: he lied. So tell me something now that you’re standing next to me in the queue of the job search center, how does it feel not being able to look down on anyone now that you’re unemployed too?
And now that we got to the sarcasm register, frankly, sometimes when I see photos of certain Facebook friends of mine – here I’m mostly talking about some I haven’t seen in ages – I tell myself that we don’t all go through our twenty-something years the same way… It’s ridiculous, some people just don’t evolve, don’t grow up, when some others just jump the gun outright posting about their marriages and – worse – their babies, but let’s not go there.
“If you love a flower, don’t pick it up. Because if you pick it up it dies and it ceases to be what you love. So if you love a flower, let it be. Love is not about possession. Love is about appreciation.”
Open your eyes, no one is out of your league. These days I see so many unhappy single people around me but none of them seems to be willing to just do something about it. It’s just insane to compare your love life when back home with the relationships/flings you may have had on the road. Day and night, pretty much. Seems that when they’re in their hometown, folks just hold themselves back all the time, scared of… scared of what?? What the heck pushes them to be constantly on their guard?!? Their reputation?? The fear of getting hurt again after several love deceptions?? Oh c’mon gimmie a break… Everyone needs spice and sparks in their life.
“Where there is desire
There is gonna be a flame
Where there is a flame
Someone’s bound to get burned
But just because it burns
Doesn’t mean you’re gonna die
You’ve gotta get up and try, and try”
Again, I find it almost chocking because of the (perhaps too) long time I’ve spent abroad, where the rules just aren’t the same. To situate the context, let me quote a fellow traveler/writer that I fully agree with:
“I’ve met lots of people on the road, including members of the opposite sex I’ve found attractive. But the nature of travel doesn’t always lend itself to long-term romantic relationships. It’s hard to make something last when everyone moves in different directions and holidays end. If you get too attached too often, you’ll have nothing but heartache as people come and go. But I’ve realized you need to simply enjoy your time together and live in the moment. Dwelling on the future will only keep you from making that leap.
Yet once in a while, you’ll find someone you really connect with. Meaningful romance on the road does happen. And when you have nowhere to be and no place to go other than where you want, sometimes there is no reason not to follow. Chase the ones you like. Don’t force yourself to say another good-bye if you don’t have to. Pursue it even if the distance seems too vast and the circumstances not right, because you never know where it could lead or how long it might last because, once in a while you meet the one and when you do, you should do everything you can to stay with them.”
And I’d add that it applies to travels just like to regular life back home. Just because you’re home doesn’t mean the game is over. The rain isn’t meant to dry up your heart.
“Take away love and our earth is a tomb.”
This all explains why I gave up with the idea of understanding that phenomenon of people going crazy with their love life once a border has been crossed but are ok to have a non-existent one once back home. Too many people tend to forget that borders exist only in the minds of men.
Some things definitely go beyond my understanding.
Understand… You only have that word in your mouth anyway – all of you – and it lasts since I was little.
One had to understand why I couldn’t play with matches, why I couldn’t drive to primary school, understand why beer was for older people only.
One had to understand why you cannot force someone to love you back, why tomorrow is another day, understand why the sun will always rise no matter the length of the blade someone just stabbed you with.
To understand why “someday you’ll understand”, how ironic.
Understand why you should not expect recognition for your efforts, understand why you shouldn’t either expect your genius to be discovered or your love to be understood.
Understand. Always understand. I do not want to understand. I’ll understand when I’m old… If I get old. Not now.
“Me laisse pas devenir un fusil sans cartouches
Un cheval sans cavalier, une cavalière à pied
Me laisse pas devenir un sprinter sans ligne d’arrivée
Un train sans passagers, une dispute qui a mal tourné
Me laisse pas devenir le mois d’novembre, une prise d’otages qui foire
Je suis le souffle du vent, je suis la pluie sur tes fenêtres
Je suis les courants d’air qui font claquer les portes
Je suis les craquements du parquet que la nuit emportent
Je suis le chat qui passe en silence sous le faisceau d’un lampadaire
Je suis les premières neiges, je suis la lune qui éclaire la mer
Je suis les odeurs de l’hiver, je suis le fracas des vagues contre la jetée
Je suis l’orage, le soleil qui perce entre les nuages
Je suis les goutes sur ton visage, je suis la vie autour de toi.”
“Don’t let me become a gun without ammunition
A riderless horse, a horse rider on foot
Don’t let me become a sprinter with no finish line
A train without passengers, an argument that has gone wrong
Don’t let me become the month of November, a hostage taking that flunks
I am a puff of wind, I am the rain on your windows
I am the air streams that make the doors slam
I am the floor thuds that the night takes away
I am the cat that silently passes under the beam of a street lamp
I am the first snows, I am the moon that illuminates the sea
I am the smells of winter, I am the waves crash against the pier
I am the storm, the sun that breaks through the clouds
I am the drops on your face, I am the life around you.”
[ 2XGM – FAUVE ]
[ Journey Of A Lifetime ] 